First and Last

Why hello blog!  Long time no post.  Not a lot of time for words today, but I do have pictures.  Will someone please stop time for me?  For just a little bit?

How did this happen so quickly???

Six

As we snuggled together on the eve before she turned 6, Elise said to me, "I wish I could stay 5... everything is perfect when you're 5."

If she only knew the greatness that awaits her; this year, next year and all the years of her life.

She will do amazing things.  She will have an amazing life.  I can feel it. 

And it all started 6 years ago today. Happy birthday to my sweet, wonderful, amazing girl.  I love you and love you.

And so it begins...

Some first day thoughts:

• Though I didn't cry, I did tear up.  I think the no-crying was mostly due to being distracted by my other two.

• When I came in the room to give her a hug good-bye, her response was a very disinterested, "okay Mom.  Fine. Bye!" I don't think she ever looked up from what she was doing.

• You'd think that would hurt my feelings, but it actually makes me feel pretty good.  Like I just might have done a good job in preparing her for stuff like this.

• She was a little ticked at only going a half day.

• When I picked her up and asked her how the day went, she told me, "it was a little too easy.  I though Kindergarten was going to be harder."  

• She was also disappointed that there was no homework.

• I need to get a friend for Mattias.  About 10 minutes after we came home from dropping Elise off, he asked me if we could go get her because he missed her.

• I'm wondering if this school stuff will affect the close relationship they have.  I really hope not... I love how they love each other.

• I am now officially old.

My new strategy

Fred is out of town for the next few days. And my offspring have been driving me nuts lately, so my thought was as follows:

• Get the crazy minions out of the house so they won't mess it up.
• Have lots of fun so they fight less.
• All this exersice will make them tired at the end of the day and I'll want to smother them less. 

Outing #1: local park

He doesn't look impressed, but he was having fun

 

My three high-flyers

Da boys

I am unsure of this swinging business
 

Outing #2: Picnic lunch at another local park and spray ground

Spray ground cutie

My skinny little chicken

He couldn't play, but was all smiles anyway

Me and my drooly littlest man

I told you he was a skinny chicken.  For the record, those are 18m swim shorts. And he's trying to pull them up, not down

Outing #3: Dinner at a local grocery store (that has a resturant and playground). Ice cream for dessert


I really don't know. This was the pose they decided on

Outing #3 included an emergency diaper change for Mattias in the middle of eating ice cream. It was truely gross and I felt bad for the other diners in our vicinity. Thank goodness for friends that just happen to walk by when you need them.  And for employees who don't stand up to you when you barge your way in even after they tell you the bathroom is closed for cleaning for the next 10 minutes.  I think the poor man could smell us coming.

All in all the mission was a success... all three children slept soundly through the night (something we've been having issues with all three of them lately), and were in a great mood this morning.  And I want to smother them a little less.

Everybody wins!

Today

This is my daughter, Elise.  She is 5 years old. She loves to play soccer.  Paint and draw.  Read.  She loves ballet and tap.  Making her little brother laugh. The colour pink.  Roller-coasters and waterslides.  She's a girly-girl with a tough side... the absolute best of both worlds. 

She makes me laugh.  Loves everyone she's ever met. Blows me away with how smart she is.  She has the innate ability to drive me bananas, but at the same time; I am so very proud the be her Mom.  And today, she makes me thankful.

Without today, Elise would not be alive.  If it wasn't for today, I would have had to say goodbye to my first-born over 4 years ago.  If today had never happened, this would be one of the last pictures I have of my daughter...

During a month that is supposed to be filled with thanks, I am most thankful for today, November 14.

Because on this day, in 1891, a baby boy was born in a small farm house in Ontario, Canada.   He would grow up and make an astonishing discovery that would save my daughter's life 117 years later.  Not just the life of my daughter, but countless others. 

Because in addition to everything I wrote about her above, Elise also has type 1 diabetes.  Her body NEEDS insulin to survive, but no longer produces it. 

It was nothing she did. Or didn't do.

Nothing she ate. Or didn't eat.

There is no cure. No special diet. No secret spice. There isn't a bark that grows on a tree that can be brewed into a tea.


But there is insulin.

Today, I don't have to watch my daughter literally starve to death because of a faulty pancreas.  And that is why I am thankful for today, the birthday of Dr. Fredrick Banting; inventor of insulin. 

He saved my daughter's life.

First day pics

This post will not have much in the way of words.  It has been a busy day... nay, week. But I would, for prosperity's sake like to post pictures of my children's first day of school.

Did you catch that? I said, children.  As in, Mattias too.

I thought it would be a cry-fest on his end, but the little man walked into his classroom as if he owned the place.  The rest of the day, he was in the best mood.  I think this learning thing is going to be good for him.

As for Elise, it was the first day of her last year of pre-school.  I will be very sad when her time is done at this amazing little school, but so thankful that she's had three years with them.

Well, I guess I had more to say than I thought. And now... pictures!

My 5 year old... how is that possible?

So cute

His backpack might be a little big...

Ready to rule the school

THIS girl...

... was born 5 years ago today.  She was and still is one of the most beautiful things (on the inside AND out) I have ever laid eyes on.

Happy Birthday sweet Elise!  We love you and you continue to amaze me every day.

All God's creatures

The list of bugs that I can tolerate is very short. I do understand that there are some bugs out there that have some purpose in this world and I'm fine with that. The moment they step one of their creepy little legs in my house though, all bets are off and I will squish or flush their buggy asses faster than you can say RAID.

The only bug that gets a pardon is the ladybug, they get a one way ticket outside instead of the business side of my shoe.

Regardless of any good qualities they may have, I hate them all; spiders, wasps, cockroaches and weird-ass beetles that I have to google just to figure out what they are.

But the bugs that win the award for "biggest jerks" are mosquitoes and ticks. Politicians too, for that matter. I cannot abide by something that lives off the lifeblood of another and offers nothing in return.

My daughter, however, loves all these nasties and more. If I am going to dispose of a creepy-crawly unfortunate enough to be found crawling inside my house, I usually have to pretend to put it outside first before I dispatch it into a watery grave. I don't return it to the wild lest it crawl right back inside.

Why the charade? Because my daughter has an extremely sweet and soft heart. She loves these bugs as if they were her friends, or worse; her own offspring. I don't want her to think her mother is a horrible person... she'll decide that soon enough when she is a teenager.

Remember this post? When she was befriending the flies that had gotten inside our house to the point of giving them names? And then she would plead with me to not kill "Sally"? Well, it happened again, this time with a significantly more vile creature.

We brought the kids home from playing in the backyard of a friend's house the other night. As I was taking Elise upstairs for her bath, she complained that "something was crawling on her", then she shrieked and batted at her cheek. The offending bug was thrown to the ground.

I took a look and my blood ran cold. I scooped it up in a baby food jar for a closer look and my fears were confirmed... it was a TICK.

Of all the nastiness on this earth, I don't think I hate anything as much as I hate the tick. I had a run-in with them before that still makes me shudder. I kept it in the jar so I could google it's ass and spent the rest of the night certain that our house was now infested with them.

The next morning I come downstairs to find Elise holding the jar and talking to her new friend, "Tina". She wanted to keep her new friend and "feed her and give her water". Ha... fat chance.

Now granted, she does not know how awful ticks are because I chose not to disclose their modus operandi. And thankfully, the tick never bit her.

But this befriending of the nasties has got to stop lest we end up run out of the neighbourhood for having some freak show menagerie.

"Tina"

She's going to Bollywood

My older brother (whom Elise has dubbed "Uncle Turkey") goes to India quite a bit. He's a musician, and he studies there. When we were in Vancouver in 2010, he had just returned and bought with him some of the cutest outfits for Elise. Unfortunately, they were a bit too big for her at the time, but fit quite nicely now.

Here's Elise striking some poses in what she calls her "Chinese Indian Princess Outfit". I'm scratching my head over the Chinese part...

When she was on the phone with my Mom (while wearing this outfit), she told her, "I wish you could see me, I look fabulous!"

She does, doesn't she?

She may not have my eyes...

The other day we were doing our usual mad-dash to get ready for school. I was busy with Mattias, and when I told Elise we had to leave in 5 minutes, she walked into the kitchen and announced that she had gone to the bathroom, brushed her teeth, and put her shoes and jacket on. All by herself and without being asked.

I told her that she did a great job, and I couldn't believe how big she was getting.

Then I said, "Where did my baby girl go?"

With a glint in her eye and a sly smile on her face she replied, "she died?"

Looks like someone inherited my twisted, dark sense of humour.

I couldn't be more proud.

Elise-isms

Me: Elise, can you get me the Cheerios?

Elise: Sure Mom... are they in the pancreas?

Me (trying not to laugh): Actually, it's called the pantry

-I'm going to use my espada (sword in Portuguese) to scare off creditors (she meant predators).

-I'm a pirate... Ahoy ladies!

-I hurt my finger toe! (a finger toe is sort of the translation of toe in Portuguese)

The other day we were at the pedi for Mattias's 15 month well-child. Elise brought her baby doll with her and when the nurse asked her how old her baby was, Elise replied, "1 year... 3 months younger than Mattias."
Later, when I asked her how she knew the baby was 3 months younger than her brother, she said, "I just knew... my brain is pretty smart.

Elise's prayer from the other night:
Dear God, thank you for Momma, Papa, Elise (that's me), Mattias and Seven. What do you look like God? Are you an angel? Do you have a beard? Do you have short hair? Oh well, I guess I'll find out when I die. Amen.

How do you not burst out laughing at that???

-I like your new glasses Momma, you look fierce!

All I can say about that one is my child as no idea who Tyra Banks is, and I have nary a clue where she heard it from. When I asked her where she had heard the word "fierce" from, she said, "I just made it up!"

Lady of the flies

You know how some people have a love/hate relationship with things? I have that with insects. Except that it's mostly hate/hate. Especially flies. I loathe them.

Unfortunately, I seem to have a little animal rights activist who majors in the welfare of flies on my hands. I am not authorized to harm flies in any way. In fact, she names the flies that surreptitiously sneak their way in to our house. Yup... she names them.

As in, "Mom, I haven't seen Sally around lately... did you do something to her?"

Or, "Don't hurt Elaine, she's my friend!"

Sigh. I've got to arrange some more play dates for that girl.

Anyway, as much as I would love to flyswatter the little winged menace back whence it came, all the while humming the Circle of Life, I refrain for Elise's sake.

Because years from now, I don't want her telling her therapist about how I used to kill her friends.

She's 4

Dear Elise,

When you have children, people love to tell you, "cherish these days, they will be grown before you know it." And while you are not yet grown, you are 4. Which is almost the same thing to me. I blinked, and my tiny baby morphed into a pre-schooler. They really must put some sort of crazy hormones in that milk.
Although I do miss you as a baby, you have grown into such an amazing little girl. You have the sweetest heart and I have never met a child that feels so deeply. I honestly don't think you have a mean bone in your body. Thankfully, your mother does and stands ready to give an atomic wedgie to anybody who dares to make you cry.
That's not to say that you are a wimp. Quite the contrary. You are probably stronger that most adults. Perhaps it's because of the diabetes, but I think it's just who you are; strong spirited.
Elise, you are beautiful; inside and out. And while most people comment on your outer beauty, I want you to remember to stay beautiful on the inside. You are kind. You are generous. You are loving and the best big sister to Mattias. I love who you are; a quirky, fun princess with a huge imagination and a heart to match.
Four years have now passed since the first moment I held you in my arms. And I have held you everyday since. It never gets old.

Thank you for making me a Mom. And happy birthday to my sweet little bean.
Love,

Your Momma

When pretty is ugly

In the midst of this record-setting heat, it's becoming increasingly more difficult to entertain and occupy my crazy children. Every morning I wake up, take a quick glance out the window, then turn on the news to confirm my fears. It's going to be another scorcher! 1256th day in row! No end in sight!

Sometimes I wonder if this is what it's like to wake up in prison everyday.

With the walls closing in, I'm trying to find fun and interesting places for Elise and Mattias to expend their energy while making a mess I don't have to clean up. This is how I found myself at our church's indoor play area the other day.

Upon walking into the play area, I could see these girls were going to trouble. Let us call them Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum (or Dee and Dum for short). They had that look. The "I am so cool and better than you" look. And at the ripe old age of 4, they had perfected the "us four and no more" mindset that seems to be so prevalent here in Texas.

Elise immediately went up to them and asked, "can I be your friend and play with you?" I sucked in my breath, because just looking at Dee and Dum, I knew what the answer would be. Sure enough, Elise came walking back to me with tears in her downcast eyes.

"Mom," she said, "those girls don't want to be my friend. They said they wouldn't play with me and to go away."

Now, anytime anyone hurts my child, be they 4 or 44 , my first instinct is to go all mama bear on their ass. Visions danced through my mind of grabbing them by their little blonde braids and dragging them to a corner where I could hiss into their ears all the mean things I could do to them (starting with cutting off those braids) if they ever dared made my daughter, or any other child, cry again.

Thankfully, I am an adult (or at least act like one on occasion), and decided to instead use this incident as a lesson for Elise.

"Elise," I asked her, "why do you want to play with those girls?"

"Because they're pretty. And I like their headbands."

(Apparently looks and fashion are important to my child. I blame Fred).

"Well," I said, "sometimes people can be pretty on the outside, but ugly on the inside. Do you understand? If you act ugly, and treat people not nice, then I think that makes you ugly on the inside. And it is much more important to be pretty on the inside than on the outside, don't you think?"

"Why?"

"Because, how we act shows who we really are. If we are mean, and make people feel bad, then we are ugly. But if we are kind, and helpful, and friendly; then that makes us beautiful. And if we act like that, that will be the kind of people who will be our friends."

Her face scrunched up and I could tell she was putting a lot of thought into what was coming next. "So", she said, "if I want people to be nice to me, I should be nice to other people?"

Do unto others, people. My 3 year old daughter gets it. Then why is it so hard for adults?

Thankfully, another little girl Elise's age came into the play area and was only too happy to play with Elise. Strangely enough, she too was shot down by Dee and Dum.

As much as I hate for Elise to feel hurt, I am thankful for the lessons she is learning. And thankful for a daughter that is beautiful... inside and out.

Take me out to the ball game

On Wednesday we decided to take our kiddos to see the (then) undefeated Texas Rangers. I was a little bit leery because three years later, the memories of Elise's first game still haunt me. There was much screaming. And home runs by the Rangers. That second part is important because every time the Rangers would hit a homer, the fireworks would go off and the screaming would start anew. I think we left after the 3rd inning.

Strangely enough, the Rangers were playing the same team as Elise's inaugural game... the Seattle Mariners. I hoped that wasn't going to be a sign. Thankfully, despite arriving a few innings late, we had a great time. Elise LOVES going to the ballpark, and Mattias did amazing, falling asleep towards the end. And the Rangers won, so.. Woo-hoo!

Go Rangers!

Already a fan at 6 months

Doing the wave

Love. Him.

Starting to get tired


Sleepy boy

Almost there

Aaaaand... he's OUT!


Rangers win!

Shots of joy

If you read my other blog, you know that life has been rough lately. Actually, rough is a bit of an understatement.

The other day, as I was sitting around bemoaning my situation, it dawned on me that maybe the reason joy was lacking in my life was due to the fact that I was sitting around, waiting for joy to come to me.

So I packed up the kids, headed to a local park, and went looking for joy. And you know what?

I found it.

I found joy in his beautiful baby blues


In her fearlessness

In the fact that she actually let me put jeans on her today, and declared, "you know, I don't really mind wearing jeans."

In his adorably, crazy hair

In open-mouthed looks of wonder (a fire truck was driving by with lights and sirens)

In her smile

In trying new things, and liking it!

In seeing just how big she really is

In swinging...

Swinging...



Swinging! And loving it!

Even in trying new things and hating it (not a big fan of the grass)

In seeing beauty, everywhere.