Tuesday, June 26, 2012

I feel the hate welling up inside me... not unlike morning sickness

Texas, Texas, Texas.   You've really gone and done it this time.  Since I first moved here, your inhabitants have wanted me to like you.  They keep telling me that one day I won't be able to imagine living anywhere else.  That this really is the best place to live.

And just when I start to think you're sort of okay, you go and pull crap like this. Really Texas? Have you looked at your weather map lately?  That's a lot of days in a row with a one followed by two numbers.  It's so utterly craptastic I can barely sleep at night.

Never mind that your geography is about as appealing as roadkill.  Or the fact that there's not really a heck of a lot to do around here.  But now we have the "did-I-fall-asleep-and-wake-up-in-hell" time of year that is called summer, and it has arrived a heck of a lot earlier than it usually does.

And in the grand scheme of things, I'm not liking you very much right now Texas.  I think I would rather eat Mexican food while having my pap smear than endure another day of this suckitude. 

Because nobody in the history of ever thinks that 108 degrees is okay. And if they're saying that they're either lying or stupid. The latter because their brains have been melted from the exessive heat.

So smarten up Texas.  Drop that mercury by about 15 degrees and maybe I'll start liking you slightly more than my yearly visit to my OB/GYN.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

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