Why don't I ever crave broccoli?

I found this post in my drafts folder... I'm not sure why I never posted it, but the memories make me laugh, so enjoy!

Dear God,

I'll bet you have people asking You, "what is up with (fill in the blank)" all the time. Like the platypus for example. I'm guessing You've taken Your fair share of ribbing on that one. Personally, I think the platypus is kinda cool; a downright funky animal. I only regret that I've never seen one in person.

But I really gotta ask You, why did You have to come up with pregnancy hormones; namely, the ones that make me crave weird things at odd hours of the night? It's not like being pregnant isn't hard enough, what with the nausea, the wild mood swings, and the getting bigger with the round ligament pain and things of that nature.

And let's not even mention the pain of child birth.

What I take issue with is the fact that I can be marching my shopping cart down a grocery store aisle, minding my own business and keeping to the exact letter of my shopping list when BAM! Out of nowhere, I spy a bag of marshmellows and think to myself, "how good would a roasted marshmellow be right now?"

Never mind that I'm nowhere near a campsite, and the fact that it's ten billion degrees out during this very pleasant (she said, sarcastically) Texas summer day. All I can think about is a white-melty-blob of high-fructose-corn-sugar-goodness. All rational thinking goes out the window and I toss the marshmellows into my cart.

Fast-forward a few hours later, and I now find myself in front of my stove, "roasting" a marshmellow over an electric burner on a wooden kabob skewer. And by "a" marshmellow, I mean 5.

Well, pregnancy cravings must happen for a reason, right God? At least that's what I'll keep telling myself as I'm double-fisting the candy corn.

Yours very hungrily,

Joanne